clientsfromhell:

Me: “What browser are you on?”

Client: “Google.”

Me: “Google Chrome?”

Client: “No, just regular Google.”

Me: “That’s the site. I want to know the browser.”

Client: “Google.”

Me: “No.”

Client: “Look, we can have this conversation forever, man. But when I hit the internet logo, Google comes up!”

Me: “Okay…What does that “internet logo” look like?

Client: “…A fiery fox, I guess. But that’s irrelevant.”

vale-decem-fowl:

ididjustsaveyourlife:

perchyjackson:

zarryforeverandever:

Why is it when I take off my glasses people ask me

“How many fingers am I holding up!?”

I don’t see this:

image


I see this:

image

NOW THAT THAT’S CLEARED UP FOR ALL THOSE IGNORANT PEOPLE IN THE WORLD

AMEN MOTHERFUCKERS

THANK

One time a black girl took my glasses and said “what color am I”

(Source: brookeeverdeen)

celestial-sexhair:

disadvantages of having thick hair

  • your head is always 100000 degrees
  • shedding everywhere
  • snapping thin combs
  • spend $100 on dye if you want to color it
  • hair is still wet 2 years after you showered
  • styling your hair takes longer than growing it

advantages of having thick hair

  • ????

I’ve discovered there’s a lot you can do inside haunted houses.

fictionalfeather:

For example, you can:

  • be in a shampoo commercial

image

  • start a boy band:

image

  • spot some choice booty:

image

  • break into song:

image

  • see some people in frankly offensive outfits:

image

  • attend a metal show:

image

  • listen to some sick jams:

image

  • discover zombieism:

image

  • sample some tasty snacks:

image

  • watch someone get burned bad:

image

  • find something you really like:

image

  • find something you really, really like:

image

  • find something you REALLY REALLY LIKE:

image

  • and wonder if you left the stove on:

image

twowhovianhearts:

tardiscrash:

crowley-for-king:

to-boldly-go-down-on-me:

The idea that nerds are awkward and don’t ever socialize is the stupidest stereotype ever because like

Have you ever seen two nerds together?

HAVE YOU EVER SEEN A CONVENTION?

Give us a topic of a common interest and we’ll socialize way past what normal people can tolerate.

Just because we don’t want to talk to you doesn’t mean we don’t want to talk.

image

(Source: fucksebastianstan)

peppermintwitch:

people are only against animal cruelty as long as it doesn’t have any impact on their lifestyle and that makes me sad